I'd like to think that it's possible to "keep the fires burning", so to speak, but just IMHO, lust isn't what I'm looking for at all. I want true, unselfish, and unconditional love. I've been playing the possessive lusting game for too long, and it has never worked out in my favor. Lust, to me, is an inferior emotion, much like comic books were to me when I was a kid....barely a fragment of a truly wonderful relationship.

Now that I am a man, I have put away childish things. I'll leave the giddy, drooling, adolescent lustful behavior to cretins like Jerry Lawler.

Another thing that I think is important, is that both you and your partner KNOW who you really are, where you want to go, and what you truly wish to be, as far as that is ever possible. Honesty can prevent a lot of unnecessary hurt, and you need to be honest with yourself, as well as with your mate.

When I was young, I wanted a sexy large-breasted slut, an easy do-nothing lifestyle, and millions of dollars.

Now I want a beautiful loving girl, a vigorously busy lifestyle, and just enough money to provide for my family's needs. My sexual desires and laziness have given way, and now all I want to feel is love, and to know that my entire family is well cared-for, and happy, while I do interesting and creative work.

Sorry if I drifted off of the subject a little bit, but this is what came to me as I read your post.

Good luck.

Behold, a pale horse, and the man that sat on him was Death

...and HELL followed with him

Edited by: Hugemon  at: 7/15/02 7:59:06 am

Back to the love/lust thing because it looks to me that the topic at hand has been more or less wrapped up and very nicely, may I add, I believe that a successful relationship needs both love and physical lust. I don't think you can be with someone without drifting away in every kiss you share or just wanting to hold them when you see them. I got myself in a mess at Christmas where two guys asked me out and whereas I believed I loved one of them very much, I wasn't physically attracted to them and I just knew somehow that it couldn't work out. If you don't want the physical intimacy with someone I don't think you can be with them long term. Maybe that's a very naive or bias opinion but from my experience (which granted isn't much) I've learnt that you need both love and lust for a relationship to be successful.

Sorry it's a bit off topic but I thought I'd add it

Quote:

---

If you don't want the physical intimacy with someone I don't think you can be with them long term. Maybe that's a very naive or bias opinion but from my experience (which granted isn't much) I've learnt that you need both love and lust for a relationship to be successful.

---

I think there has been a major-misconception of the word "intimacy" in recent times. Because to me, intimacy is created between two people by TALKING...communicating to your loved one about your wants, needs, goals, and impossible dreams.

My problem with LUST as opposed to sexual-LOVE, is that lust itself is very insensitive to anothers needs.

I don't like the word SELFISH, because in all honesty...if you aren't happy & secure yourself, you cannot "be there" or commit yourself to others in an appreciable fashion.

However, I cannot help but view sexual-love, in all of it's sensitive rapacious glory, as completely superior to common anamalistic lust.

LOVE doesn't have to be as tame as some people would try to make it out to be....just ask Heather.
*nudge, nudge, wink, wink*